Daddy's Girl

By Venus Schrader

"Daddy's girl.” Those words take me back to a time when I would cringe. My father was a man to be feared. He was as big as the Incredible Hulk, a body builder and a mean drunk. He spent most of his youth and early adult years behind bars, including the time of my birth. “Daddy's girl?” No thank you, I'll pass. However I did have a desire to be precious and provided for.

This had a huge impact on my life when I became a Christian. There I was, a frail twenty-one year-old girl, battered, abused by the world then thrown away like the evening trash. I was desperate for a savior, not a daddy. The last thing I wanted to hear is that God is my heavenly Father.  How can He be my father? Why is He my father? I don't need a father. My heart and mind were on overload with questions, fear and confusion. 

            
I wish I could say that all at once my mind and heart changed and I welcomed God into my life as a loving father. But it was a process, and God was patient and kind and He healed my heart along the way. During this time, I forgave my dad, started to pray that he would accept Christ and that we would have a relationship one day. He was living miles away in another state, and still drinking himself to death. So the odds were slim to none.

vintage family photo

            
In 2008 God answered my prayers and restored me and my dad's relationship. Our daily phone calls lasted for hours on end. The first time we prayed together, each word released a tear that washed away the past. The gratitude I had for God in that moment could have overflowed the Grand Canyon. Before I knew it, I looked up and at forty years old, I was a daddy's girl.

            
On January 16, 2011 at 2:30am our journey took a turn to eternity. The nursing home called with the message, “It won't be long now.” My feet seemed to dangle at the edge of the bed, I was three again and I wanted my daddy to be my hero, not a monster. And I praise God he had become my hero so far away from the monster of my past. “Can I talk to him?” I asked. As I turned to the 23rd Psalm, I was told he was intubated and could not respond.  Before I finished the Psalm I could hear my daddy trying to talk. I said a prayer of thanksgiving to God for his life and our relationship. I told him we would be together forever. They said he opened his eyes and was trying to talk to me. I heard every word, he said “You’re my girl.”

    
Is your relationship with God based on your relationship with your earthly Daddy?

 If it is anything like mine, know that God can make all things beautiful in his time.

Venus: My husband and I, three daughters and one granddaughter landed in Wilmington, NC five years ago. I enjoy spending time with family and friends exploring the wonders of life. As God leads I hope to express this journey of  life through the beauty of words.